When you share custody of your children with your ex-partner, the holiday schedule can become quite a challenge; even, it could be said that it is one of the biggest custody conflicts that occur during the year. Regardless of any disagreement you may have while choosing the dates that the children will spend with you or your ex, it is important to remember that the only thing to consider is the happiness of your children. It should be stressed that the tension and conflicts between you and your ex-partner can be avoided by reaching an agreement that favors them both.
What can you do to avoid these confrontations with your ex-partner?
First of all you must review your custody order or agreement, it is necessary to corroborate that there is a certain date, since generally the vacations are rotated annually between the parents. However, most parents forget to review these orders or agreements until it is too late to make the desired changes. If your order is ambiguous or you do not remember who had the children on the previous vacation, contact the other parent and see if they can reach an agreement that suits them both, so that there is no confusion, especially for your children.
In case you do not have an order or custody agreement, try to reach an agreement, either directly with the other parent or through a lawyer. As a last resort, you can try to go to court and have a judge solve the problem, however, it is unlikely that you can get a court date before the vacation; so it is important to consider the use of mediation as a means to reach an agreement.
Another important point is not to discuss the holiday dates with your children until you have confirmed where and when they will spend those days. Do not wait at the last moment to share with them what the plans will be, children appreciate knowing beforehand these kinds of things, so they can anticipate how they will spend their holiday season.
And finally, do not put your children in the middle of a custody battle, especially if it’s a holiday dispute. If you and your former partner cannot agree on who will have the children on a certain date, do not ask them where they want to spend their vacation. The children of separated parents are already facing enough stress and pressure, putting them in the middle of this type of conflict will not do them any good, on the contrary.
If you’d like to change your custody and visitation schedule, or like to consult with a family law attorney regarding your case, click here to schedule or send an SMS to 619-648-9652.
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