1. Choosing the wrong divorce process
You have choices about what type of divorce process you use, you can usemediation, negotiation, or collaborative law. If you have to, you can always still fight in court. What's important is that, before you start your divorce, you take the time to learn about your choices, and then choose the divorce process that will work best for you.
2. Choosing the wrong divorce lawyer
You have to know who you are, who your spouse is, and what kind of divorce process is likely to work best for you. Then you have to hire a lawyer who is an expert in that kind of divorce process. (This is also not the time to hire that "friend of the family" who specializes in real estate closings. Even if you think your case is simple, you need to find a divorce attorney who is an expert in family law.)
3. Starting off your case with a bang
If you start your divorce case by immediately going on the attack, you are going to create World War III from day one. Your spouse is going to respond by "lawyering up," and attacking you back. Before you know it, you will burn through thousands of dollars, you will totally hate your spouse, and your life will be filled with drama. So, before you open the floodgates of anger, you might want to think twice about the tsunami that will come afterwards.
4. Not taking the time to get full financial information
Can you settle your case without knowing how much money you and your spouse have, what you owe, and how much each of you really earns? Yes.Should you? No. You can't divide something fairly if you don't know what exists. ou can't figure out whether you will be able to support yourself after your divorce unless you know how much money you are going to have coming in, and how much will be going out. You have to take the time to figure out and really understand your finances before you can fairly resolve your case.
5. Fighting for custody without understanding what that means
Legal child custody is the right to make certain major life decisions for your child. Residential custody is where your child lives most of the time. Visitation, or parenting time, is the time you spend with your child. If you and your spouse can not get along at all, and can not communicate at all, sharing joint custody of your child is probably going to be a nightmare. In that case, maybe fighting for sole custody makes sense. But if you can at least work most things out for the benefit of your kids, then waging a gigantic custody battlewill only cost you a fortune, take forever, and put your kids through hell.
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